I took Liam's advice. I think it looks a little better and not so heavy. Let me know what you think.
Dance - I want to be like my
dance teacher
My first Ballet exam passed was RAD Primary to grade 2.
Further ballet exams passed; grades 3 to 6 with the ISTD. Tap Dance exams passed; grades 1 to 3 and Junior
Bronze, Silver and Gold and Elementary. I played the Piano
Forte, and attained grades 1 to five with Trinity College of Music by
the age of 12 years.
After three years on a Dance Teacher Training Course at ‘The Guildford School of
Acting’ I attained Associate and Advanced levels in Greek Dance (Ruby Ginner), and the same for National Dance.
I passed Cecchetti Ballet at Elementary level.
Other dance styles covered were; Contemporary
and Jazz Dance. I won ‘The
best progressive dance teacher’ award in
my first year. Other subject studied; Speech and Drama,
exams with LAMDA from grade 5 to
silver Medal and Child Psychology
I graduated in 1979 with a ‘Diploma’
‘The Corinda Hall
School of Dance’, established in 1982 for students to take exams and
perform at Arts festivals, events, and competitions.
I took dance into my
community and promoted Dance in local school and colleges. I introduced after school dance clubs. Welcomed and supported enthusiastically by
Head teachers, parents and the local council.
I was contracted to teach key stages 1 & 2 in at St. Bede’s and St. Anne’s Junior School
and key stage 4 at Bishop Challoner
School. I devised,
delivered and set my own topic projects.
I would collaborate with ‘Arts’ organisations such as ‘Hampshire Dance Trust’,
Eastleigh Arts’ and BT Dance’96. An organisation platform for dance groups,
clubs and teachers in the community to network and perform their dances
In 1995 I secured a three
year contract and given a budget through Hampshire
County Council to introduce dance at key stage
3 at ‘The Vyne School’. End of
term performances in collaboration with the Music,
Drama and Art departments lead the school to achieve
‘Performing Arts’ status.
In 1997 I secured lottery funding for a community dance project. I produced, directed and choreographed a
musical show with 200 performers. I
managed all the legal administration, theatre design, theatre technicians, licenses,
professional guest artistes, marketing and advertising with local and national
media was on a bigger scale than I was used to.
In 1999 to retired from
teaching dance, I wanted a different challenge. I joined the Telecoms industry. I progressed from Customer Services to Sales
& Marketing Manager through to Product
Manager. I was motivated and
determined to learn about Systems and Software usage and became a competent user of Microsoft packages up to intermediate level and an understanding
of the commercial world of this industry.
At
my last company, Virgin Media, I was Support Account Manager.
My
duties included; Managing Sales Opportunities (MSO)
Management and
Coordination
of all provisioning of sales, quotations, orders and billing, presentation
of
financial analysis, management of the Business Tracker and a shared target.
Co-organised
and took part in the ‘Three Peaks Challenge’.
My
social life included Latin Dancing and started teaching beginners
as
a guest teacher.
In
June 2010 I became a freelance dance teacher.
My
web site is; www.corinda.co.uk I am currently teaching Dance in Education
in
Primary, Junior & Secondary Schools. My new interest is the
Middle
Eastern Dance culture.
I
am also a choreographer for First Dance UK. I
have some TV and acting experience
on a film set. I have danced in music video’s
I
was thrilled to have found BAPP in Arts conversion course. It will be challenging,
engaging
and will give me the opportunity to purse my continuing passion for the Art
of
dance.
I
am self motivated, eager, determined, and enthusiastic.
I
value the opportunity to further my education as a mature student and discover
skills
needed to become successful in my future career, as Dance Lecturer.
Hello Corinda
ReplyDeleteI love your style of writing it really resonates with me. I really enjoyed your first draft as it was not the same as all the other CVs you read. I agree with Liam's point as reader faced with a mass of writing, especially if they have a large pile of job applications to get through may be a little reluctant to take the time that your profile requires, and in my opinion deserves. I have also read your second draft and although it is easier to look at, for me, and this is only in my opinion, loses some of the sole (the getting to know you) that your first draft had. I am not professing to have all the answers or that you should change things it is merely an observation. I would however think about the use of your profile. I doubt that you would be sending this out willy nilly to any and everyone look ing for a job. I imagine that you may use it sparingly for the right opportunity as and when it presents its self. If that is indeed the case then you can afford to tailor make it to that specific job, and thereby omitting the superfluous items and highlighting those that are most applicable. This may allow you to retain the love and spirit that came across most strongly in your first draft with some of the down to business of the second.
Although it is important to play the game, on occasions, i would hate to see the free, caring nature that i believe you are get squeezed out, as this is a huge USP (Unique selling point) which is what will stand you out from the others.
Just some thoughts. I hope that this has been more of a help than a hinderance.
Stay safe - Phil
Hi Phil
ReplyDeleteYour comments really picked up on my reason for re writting this profile.. You are right, my first draft was the real me but not always suitable for a job application. The 2nd draft shows that I can, as you say, 'play the game' and cut my cloth. It is a judgement that one makes for that right opportunity. For me it has to be the right opportunity/job. It's second time around for me and my priorities are very different from my fellow students on this course. I enjoyed your comments and thoughts and felt that you picked up the changes in the drafts intuitively, or that I managed to put myself accross clearly. Not quite sure where to go from here on this one now..Really appreciated your feed back..Enjoy our day.